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Monthly Muse |
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August 2004 |
Volume 6 |
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Visit or write at: www.midwestnlp.com jim@midwestnlp.com Do you have an upcoming training event that you would like to include? Contact me at jim@midwestnlp.com to include yours! See the end of the newsletter for many local upcoming events! Use NLP presuppositions and learn how to enjoy every moment of every day! ·
There is no failure, only feedback! Feature Article-> “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” -Mary Robeling “If one advances in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success in common hours.” -Henry David Thoreau Feature Article-> “The time that gets wasted is the time you don’t spend in each moment, experiencing and appreciating it for what it is.” -Barbara de Angelis “NLP…is the art and science of personal excellence. All life coaches should take personal responsibility for acquiring a sound knowledge of NLP basics.” -The Life Coaching Handbook -Curly Martin Definitions-> Upcoming
NLP Trainings! -> Upcoming local events: Larry Garrett Hypnosis
open forum discussion, Sunday 8/1: 1pm. National Guild of
Hypnotists Monthly meeting: Tuesday 8/10: Toastmasters Coaches Elite,
Wednesday 8/11: Come as a guest! Coachville Study Group:
Tuesday, 8/17: 7-9pm. Contact: sandee@sandeeabern.com |
IN THIS EDITION! Introduction-Welcome Issue #6 Value Added Info! Article: Should’s, Ought’s and Gremlin’s Article: What Do You Want? (And get it!) Definitions: Anchoring More! Upcoming workshops and local
events! Value Added
Info! Issue #6 Dear friends and associates, Welcome to newsletter #6. THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK! Many of you have shared what you liked and enjoyed in past issues, OUTSTANDING! I have not yet heard from some of you who may have questions or comments of what can be improved, please let me know! In recent issues I have shifted the focus from pure NLP to a mix of value added material. I say “value added” as that is my goal: to insure that the material is valuable and useful not only to my fellow NLP’rs but to the rest of you too who are not NLP Practitioners who also read and enjoy this. In both articles the “jest” of the synergy I offer with NLP in Coaching is highlighted. The first article speaks to those should’s and ought’s too many of us have in our head; the second article is a must read if you are interested in getting more joy, more fulfillment and more of whatever it is you want in your life! For more information about NLP, please visit
my website at www.midwestnlp.com.
Please email with any and all comments and suggestions at jim@midwestnlp.com. Also, if you desire to include an article,
upcoming training information, comments or other NLP training information,
please let me know! This is our world,
lets all be a part of it! Jim Accetta Should’s, Ought’s and Gremlins You have to do this. I must complete this assignment. You have to eat a good breakfast. We have to finish the project before Thursday. Is it the right way to do act? Is this the correct way to write an article? What should you do? UUUUGGGHHHH!!! So many should’s, ought to’s, have to’s… TOO MANY! How many of you allow one or more of these restrictive language violations rule your days? How many allow them to rule your life? That’s right, allow them to rule you, because you know, it is your choice. What I’m referring to here are 3 things. The first, that
you have a choice, a conscious choice to choose over and over again how you
will act, how you will feel, how and what
you choose to think about. The second two things are the language
violation patterns better known in the NLP world as Modal Operator’s of
Necessity and Lost Performatives. Over and over and over again… my theme in talking and writing is YOU HAVE CHOICES! And in those choices, you choose the life you are living, every moment, of every hour, of every day! Knowing that you have this choice, what do you want to do? Are you living the life you truly want? Client after client reveal to me the should’s, have to’s, and the need to’s in their life. In coaching, these are referred to as “Gremlins” (see Rick Carson’s book, Taming Your Gremlins). Sometimes they are useful, sometimes they are not! Do you know? Are yours useful? Read on and learn! I encourage all of you, list the “necessities” you tell
yourself, list the “goods and bads, the should’s and ought to’s” that you
believe or hear in your mind. Now, ask yourself: What would happen if I didn’t? What would
occur if I didn’t? or Who says it is right?
Who believes this to be true?
Then ask yourself, what do I really want? (If you have some challenges
with this question, see the next article, revisit past issues, or contact me!)
Too many people allow these notions of right and wrong, should and shouldn’t
to rule and thus limit their life. I
am not suggesting that they are all unproductive. What I am suggesting is
listen to them, examine them and make the conscious choice to live the
kind of life you truly want! What Do You Want? What do you want? Really, what do you want? Sound simple, doesn’t it? Well, imagine a life where you get what you want. That’s right, you ask for it and get it… no strings attach. Now, what do you want? Go ahead…dream big! Ask for anything! Make a picture of you having what you want, a big colorful picture….now, make that into a moving picture… You like? If you could ask for anything, anything at all, what would you ask for? Take a moment, grab a pen and paper and write down all the things you want… all the things you could ever dream of wanting, remember, dream big! Now let me ask, how many of you wrote down, or answered in your head what you didn’t want? How many of you said to your self… “well, I don’t want X… or I want to avoid Y”? Or, how many of you stopped short, allowing that voice we once thought was so wise to influence you and say... “you can’t ask for that, it isn’t realistic”? Our brain is operating constantly, keeping us breathing,
keeping our heart beating, our blood flowing.
Our unconscious is designed for survival; it is hard wired into us… (at
least most of us)… Our conscious mind
helps direct our unconscious by pointing our brain in a certain direction…
what direction do you want to point your brain in? What more do you want in your life? Each week I stand up in front of people at networking
groups and discuss the value I provide as a trainer, consultant and as a
Professional Life Coach. I talk about
the problems and challenges most of us face:
stress, frustrations, not enough time to do the things we really want
to do; constant challenges of appointments, telephone calls, meetings,
running the kids to camp, picking up the cleaners, going to the grocery
store, cooking or picking up dinner, perhaps some work later or running the
kids to another activity…then…some rest? What is the rest? HOLY COW! How
often do we really take the time to consider what we really want? So…what do you want? What do you truly
want? What is it that stirs you soul…
that ignites that passion within? What
brings you joy and fulfillment? Not sure?
Hmmmm…. I often will ask my clients to look at themselves in the future, and ask themselves: what do you need to do; what do you need to see; what do need to experience so that your life is one of fulfillment, one of few or no regrets? How about you? Let me tell you a bit more about coaching. Life coaching is all about helping you to live
your dreams…Living the kind of life you truly want! That’s right! We start with exploring who
you are; you, your values, what drives you, what your passions are, what irks
you and more. Then we focus on what
you truly want to accomplish, what it is that ignites that fire within. What
brings you joy, what makes you align
with what is truly your core, what is truly human inside of you… And then
there’s the call to action. The plan
and work we do together to insure you’re getting everything you want… AND MORE! Does it sound appealing yet? If you want some part of this, or more… then contact me. This month I have some space available to offer a limited amount of complimentary coaching sessions the first week of August. Experience this yourself! Have you thought about coaching? Or how you too can begin
living a more fulfilling, rewarding life? Or how you too can
experience more joy and contentment in all that you do? Over 800 people
receive this letter; there are 4 available spaces Wednesday, August 4th
and 4 available Wednesday August 11th so…call now to reserve your space! Call (847-749-0759) Definition: Anchoring See more definitions at www.midwestnlp.com/definitions Upcoming NLP
Trainings: NLP & Coaching: A
Natural Synergy What is NLP? *FREE INTRODUCTION* Wednesday, August 25th Become a part of
a growing group of people who have learned to take control over their own
brain. Enjoy the magic, come have some
fun and learn the simplicity of applying NLP principles in your daily
life! Learn about unconscious rapport
and more NLP FUNDAMENTALS! Back again for another weekend! Gain basic
skills and knowledge of NLP; learn the power of unconscious rapport; gain
varied perspectives to provide new insights and solutions; improve your ability
to gain rapport and influence; understand the power of language and how we
create meaning in our lives. Learn about creating states, anchors and more!!!
Come prepared to learn more than you thought possible in any two days! Practitioner
Certification Training: With Excellence Quest Master Practitioner
Certification Training: With Excellence Quest Jim Accetta, Certified Trainer of NLP
Early bird discounts end
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Richard Bandler in
I've put my name down for Personal
Enhancement on the 17-19th September. This is a chance to spend three quality
days with Richard with a small group of delegates who are interested in
personal development and change.
John Grinder in
John is running a seminar on NLP and coaching
on the 26-30th November. I'm particularly looking forward to this. NLP has
always been a superb basis for coaching and John has some really good corporate
experience.