Midwest NLP

     Monthly Muse

 

           August 2004

                               Volume 6

 

Visit or write at:

www.midwestnlp.com

jim@midwestnlp.com

 

 

 

 

Do you have an upcoming training event that you would like to include? Contact me at jim@midwestnlp.com

to include yours!

 

 

See the end of the newsletter for many local upcoming events!

 

Use NLP presuppositions and learn how to enjoy every moment of every day!

·     There is no failure, only feedback!

 

 

Feature Article->

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

      -Mary Robeling

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“If one advances in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success in common hours.”                    

 -Henry David Thoreau  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Feature Article->

 

 

 

“The time that gets wasted is the time you don’t spend in each moment, experiencing and appreciating it for what it is.”

    -Barbara de Angelis

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“NLP…is the art and science of personal excellence.  All life coaches should take personal responsibility for acquiring a sound knowledge of NLP basics.”

-The Life Coaching         Handbook

          -Curly Martin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Definitions->

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Upcoming NLP Trainings! ->

 

 

 

Upcoming local events:

 

Larry Garrett Hypnosis open forum discussion, Sunday 8/1: 1pm. Chicago

3020 N. Kimball Ave.

 

National Guild of Hypnotists Monthly meeting: Tuesday 8/10: 7pm Leidecker Center, Elgin.

 

 

Toastmasters Coaches Elite, Wednesday 8/11: 7pm Hinsdale- Wild Oats Market

Come as a guest!

 

 

Chicago Coaching Alliance Monthly Meeting: Saturday 8/14: 9:30am-12pm Hinsdale- Wild Oats Market

 

Coachville Study Group: Tuesday, 8/17: 7-9pm. Buffalo Grove

Contact: sandee@sandeeabern.com

 

IN THIS EDITION!

 

Introduction-Welcome Issue #6 Value Added Info!

Article:          Should’s, Ought’s and Gremlin’s

Article:          What Do You Want? (And get it!)

Definitions:   Anchoring

More!            Upcoming workshops and local events!

Value Added Info! Issue #6

Dear friends and associates,

     Welcome to newsletter #6. THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK!  Many of you have shared what you liked and enjoyed in past issues, OUTSTANDING! I have not yet heard from some of you who may have questions or comments of what can be improved, please let me know!

     In recent issues I have shifted the focus from pure NLP to a mix of value added material. I say “value added” as that is my goal: to insure that the material is valuable and useful not only to my fellow NLP’rs but to the rest of   you too who are not NLP Practitioners who also read and enjoy this.

 

In both articles the “jest” of the synergy I offer with NLP in Coaching is highlighted.  The first article speaks to those should’s and ought’s too many of us have in our head; the second article is a must read if you are interested in getting more joy, more fulfillment and more of whatever it is you want in your life!

    For more information about NLP, please visit my website at www.midwestnlp.com. Please email with any and all comments and suggestions at jim@midwestnlp.com.  Also, if you desire to include an article, upcoming training information, comments or other NLP training information, please let me know!  This is our world, lets all be a part of it!

 

Jim Accetta

Should’s, Ought’s and Gremlins

     You have to do this.  I must complete this assignment.   You have to eat a good breakfast.  We have to finish the project before Thursday. Is it the right way to do act?  Is this the correct way to write an article? What should you do?

UUUUGGGHHHH!!!  So many should’s, ought to’s, have to’s… TOO MANY!  How many of you allow one or more of these restrictive language violations rule your days?  How many allow them to rule your life?  That’s right, allow them to rule you, because you know, it is your choice. 

 

What I’m referring to here are 3 things. The first, that you have a choice, a conscious choice to choose over and over again how you will act, how you will feel, how and what  you choose to think about. The second two things are the language violation patterns better known in the NLP world as Modal Operator’s of Necessity and Lost Performatives.

 

Over and over and over again… my theme in talking and writing is YOU HAVE CHOICES!  And in those choices, you choose the life you are living, every moment, of every hour, of every day!  Knowing that you have this choice, what do you want to do?  Are you living the life you truly want?

 

Client after client reveal to me the should’s, have to’s, and the need to’s in their life.  In coaching, these are referred to as “Gremlins” (see Rick Carson’s book, Taming Your Gremlins). Sometimes they are useful, sometimes they are not!  Do you know? Are yours useful? Read on and learn!

 

I encourage all of you, list the “necessities” you tell yourself, list the “goods and bads, the should’s and ought to’s” that you believe or hear in your mind. Now, ask yourself:  What would happen if I didn’t? What would occur if I didn’t? or Who says it is right?  Who believes this to be true?  Then ask yourself, what do I really want? (If you have some challenges with this question, see the next article, revisit past issues, or contact me!) Too many people allow these notions of right and wrong, should and shouldn’t to rule and thus limit their life.  I am not suggesting that they are all unproductive. What I am suggesting is listen to them, examine them and make the conscious choice to live the kind of life you truly want!

What Do You Want?  

 

What do you want? Really, what do you want?  Sound simple, doesn’t it? Well, imagine a life where you get what you want. That’s right, you ask for it and get it… no strings attach.  Now, what do you want?  Go ahead…dream big!  Ask for anything!  Make a picture of you having what you want, a big colorful picture….now, make that into a moving picture…  You like?  If you could ask for anything, anything at all, what would you ask for? Take a moment, grab a pen and paper and write down all the things you want… all the things you could ever dream of wanting, remember, dream big! 

 

Now let me ask, how many of you wrote down, or answered in your head what you didn’t want? How many of you said to your self… “well, I don’t want X… or I want to avoid Y”?  Or, how many of you stopped short, allowing that voice we once thought was so wise to influence you and say... “you can’t ask for that, it isn’t realistic”?

 

Our brain is operating constantly, keeping us breathing, keeping our heart beating, our blood flowing.  Our unconscious is designed for survival; it is hard wired into us… (at least most of us)…  Our conscious mind helps direct our unconscious by pointing our brain in a certain direction… what direction do you want to point your brain in?  What more do you want in your life?

 

Each week I stand up in front of people at networking groups and discuss the value I provide as a trainer, consultant and as a Professional Life Coach.  I talk about the problems and challenges most of us face:  stress, frustrations, not enough time to do the things we really want to do; constant challenges of appointments, telephone calls, meetings, running the kids to camp, picking up the cleaners, going to the grocery store, cooking or picking up dinner, perhaps some work later or running the kids to another activity…then…some rest? What is the rest? HOLY COW!  How often do we really take the time to consider what we really want?  So…what do you want? What do you truly want?  What is it that stirs you soul… that ignites that passion within?  What brings you joy and fulfillment? 

 

Not sure? Hmmmm….

 

I often will ask my clients to look at themselves in the future, and ask themselves: what do you need to do; what do you need to see; what do need to experience so that your life is one of fulfillment, one of few or no regrets? How about  you?

Let me tell you a bit more about coaching.  Life coaching is all about helping you to live your dreamsLiving the kind of life you truly want!  That’s right! We start with exploring who you are; you, your values, what drives you, what your passions are, what irks you and more.  Then we focus on what you truly want to accomplish, what it is that ignites that fire within. What brings you joy, what makes you align with what is truly your core, what is truly human inside of you… And then there’s the call to action.  The plan and work we do together to insure you’re  getting everything you want… AND MORE! 

Does it sound appealing yet?  If you want some part of this, or more… then contact me.  This month I have some space available to offer a limited amount of complimentary coaching sessions the first week of August. Experience this yourself!

Have you thought about coaching? Or how you too can begin living a more fulfilling, rewarding life? Or how you too can experience more joy and contentment in all that you do? Over 800 people receive this letter; there are 4 available spaces Wednesday, August 4th and 4 available Wednesday August 11th so…call now to reserve your space! Call (847-749-0759)

Definition: Anchoring

  
The process of associating an internal response with some external trigger (similar to classical conditioning) so that the response may by quickly, and sometimes covertly, reaccessed. Anchoring occurs every day in 1:1 interpersonal situations, families, groups, and through mass media. Learning NLP allows us to have more control over the anchors in our world, and ultimately how to be more effective in our communications with others.

See more definitions at www.midwestnlp.com/definitions

 

 

Upcoming NLP Trainings:

NLP & Coaching: A Natural Synergy
August 19th -
7:00pm-8:30pm Central Standard Time
****TELE CLASS**** Only $39.00! Register now by contacting jim@midwestnlp.com
Experience the natural synergy of NLP & Coaching! Learn how to accelerate your coaching practice easily and effortlessly with just a few simple NLP tools! Contact Jim for more information and to sign up at jim@midwestnlp.com.

What is NLP?

*FREE INTRODUCTION*

Wednesday, August 25th 7pm.
Holiday Inn-Rolling Meadows, IL. RSVP jim@midwestnlp.com

Become a part of a growing group of people who have learned to take control over their own brain.  Enjoy the magic, come have some fun and learn the simplicity of applying NLP principles in your daily life!  Learn about unconscious rapport and more

NLP FUNDAMENTALS!
Saturday & Sunday: August 28-29: 9am-6pm.
Holiday Inn-Rolling Meadows, IL. RSVP jim@midwestnlp.com         

Back again for another weekend! Gain basic skills and knowledge of NLP; learn the power of unconscious rapport; gain varied perspectives to provide new insights and solutions; improve your ability to gain rapport and influence; understand the power of language and how we create meaning in our lives. Learn about creating states, anchors and more!!! Come prepared to learn more than you thought possible in any two days!

Practitioner Certification Training: With Excellence Quest
8 Intensive Days! September 11th-18th.
Barbara Stepp, Master Trainer of NLP and DHE and                           Jim Accetta, Certified Trainer of NLP.
                                                        Early bird discounts end 8/15/04!!                                                                                         Contact jim@midwestnlp.com  for more info

Master Practitioner Certification Training: With Excellence Quest
8 Intensive Days! September 21st-28th.                                           Barbara Stepp, Master Trainer of NLP and DHE and

 Jim Accetta, Certified Trainer of NLP                                                                                 Early bird discounts end 8/15/04!!                                                 Contact jim@midwestnlp.com  for more info.

Richard Bandler in London

I've put my name down for Personal Enhancement on the 17-19th September. This is a chance to spend three quality days with Richard with a small group of delegates who are interested in personal development and change.

Personal Enhancement

John Grinder in London

John is running a seminar on NLP and coaching on the 26-30th November. I'm particularly looking forward to this. NLP has always been a superb basis for coaching and John has some really good corporate experience.

NLP Coaching